Current mood: Simply Happy

Quality time

sometimes dun you feel that you need some personal times for yourself? the time when you stay alone, doing whatever you want to do?

It was long ago when I had my very own personal times. I got it again on last Sat. And I went to the park at my apartment to sit. Just to sit and watching people who were jogging and kids who were cycling; breathing in fresh air from the greens. Thats one of the thing I wanted to do all the while. Every morning when I passby the park to the train station, I would have this envy-feeling towards the people in the park. and finally, I can 'use' the park and to be one of them. So happy and that made my last weekend a good one.

I feel the pain

I feel the pain, I would say directly. The crisis is hitting on me. Financial industry is so gloomy now. Recruiters here are picking personnel from the Lehman Bro directly, it was reported. It also reported that job market at least needs a year to recover. Sad, sad, sad.

Or maybe I shall be changing fields; to become a farmer? to become a factory worker where I need to punch my card when I report to work, where I need to go on shift. OMG!!!!!!!!!!!

I think I am gonna witness the most serious economy crisis ever since the Great Depression 1929, which is originated in the States, caused by debt, the Fed Reserves & money supply and some other factors.

Autumn

It was in the autumn. The weather was cold. I woke up in the morning, hesitating to go to work. I had to walk for around half an hour to the office. With the cold weather, I just wished to hibernate inside my sheets. Thank god, I had his bag with me. Eventhough he was not around, the bag that he used to carry has got his smell in it. Carrying the bag with me, I could smell him. That made me warm.

Kinda looking forward for the days to come. It will be all by myself, I can do anything I want, I can have all the freedom. Soak up the sun on the beach or simply indulge myself at the spa is all I want to do all these while. There is a beach bar, so I wont be bored during the night. The beach, the breeze, the bikini, the book, the sunglasses....what I am looking for is the freedom and the carefree that I am gonna get. I dont think I will feel bored, being alone once in awhile is nice.

I'm gonna soak up the sun While it's still free
I'm gonna soak up the sun Before it goes out on me

Have you ever flashed back the old memories and found yourself crying over the past? You cried, cause of the happy memories, and of corse, for the sad one as well.

Old memories make me feeling old.

This far I have come.

I am getting old. I dun like the songs by those new artists, I dun like the new Vios....I cant find anything suitable for me at Sg Wang anymore. I want to carry that Classic Flap from Chanel , wear Ferragamo ballerina shoes. Omg, I am really getting old.

The Heart of the Matter

I got the call today, I didn't wanna hear
But I knew that it would come
An old true friend of ours was talkin' on the phone
She said you found someone
And I thought of all the bad luck,
And the struggles we went through
And how I lost me and you lost you
What are these voices outside love's open door
Make us throw off our contentment
And beg for something more?

I'm learning to live without you now
But I miss you sometimes
The more I know, the less I understand
All the things I thought I knew, I'm learning again
I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

These times are so uncertain
There's a yearning undefined
...People filled with rage
We all need a little tenderness
How can love survive in such a graceless age
The trust and self-assurance that can lead to happiness
They're the very things we kill, I guess
Pride and competition cannot fill these empty arms
And the work I put between us,
Doesn't keep me warm

I'm learning to live without you now
But I miss you, Baby
The more I know, the less I understand
All the things I thought I figured out, I have to learn again
I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But everything changes
And my friends seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

There are people in your life who've come and gone
They let you down and hurt your pride
Better put it all behind you; life goes on
You keep carrin' that anger, it'll eat you inside

I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
Because the flesh will get weak
And the ashes will scatter
So I'm thinkin' about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

********************
listening to this song now, SATC is still my favourite favourite. Carrie is still on my mind. Her dresses her shoes...oh ya talking about shoes, I think I must not buy any more shoes, I have problem keeping my shoes in my tiny room, or outside the apartment already. Girls ya, shoes shoes shoes....

......happy.

• went back to msia last weekend. attended my fren's wedding at Kota Bharu. a reunion for the ji muis. had a great time having fun with them there. happy.
  
• it had been so long i never mamak-ing at kl, and finally i got the chance to do it on last friday when i landed kl. the feeling was so nice although i felt a bit overage. happy (age is really catching haha)
  
• i had this super nice nasi goreng kampung and keropok in KB. although i was having bad bad sorethroat n coughing, i still finished it. happy.
• i am going back to KL for another time of wedding dinner/reunion party again this weekend, and i am waiting for that to come. happy.
• finally, pms was over. mood is catching up. happy.
• are we having mooncake festival celebration at 181 park this fri night? also happy lah ya.
• the new cd i bought, it is so nice. happy listening to all the songs
• happy. happy. happy. happy. happy.